I sent my husband a text today. It said, “I’m signing them up for public school!!” Oh yes, I went there. I was so fed up. I was done parenting. Shoot, I was done adulting! I felt like a homeschool mom failure.
Sometimes, homeschooling feels so overwhelming. Today I had one of “those” days. My first grader was acting up like crazy. I was yelling. School took forever to get finished. I thought the day was never going to end.
Here’s a video of me chatting about being a homeschool mom failure! Don’t like videos? No biggie! Just keep reading…
Homeschooling isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. There are some very dark and stormy days. There may even be some dark and stormy years. It may leave you wondering where you went wrong. Why isn’t your family happy to be together like all of the other homeschool families? Why are you counting down the seconds until the school work is finished as opposed to being able to cherish these moments?
The answer? Sometimes real life isn’t pretty.
There will be days you get nothing done. There will be seasons where “school” may not happen. There may even be times when you’re wondering if your kids are learning anything at all. There will be days where you wish with every fiber of your being you could have your days to yourself to go sit in a coffee shop with other moms while your kids are off at school, leaving you in peace.
We aren’t promised perfect days. We are promised trials and we are promised hardships. But, that’s why we need to lean on the Lord. My months of seemingly endless hard days with my son have helped me learn that sometimes *I* need to have a heart adjustment, not just my kids. They may seem like the “problem”, but a lot of times, it’s actually us, the parents, who also need a change of heart.
So, what’s a homeschool mom failure to do?
This is where homeschooling can come in. I’m serious. A big part of homeschooling is that it’s also molding ME as a mother. Yes, I teach my kids. But, the lessons I learn through homeschooling are so much bigger. I know that I am being called to homeschool because the Lord is trying to teach me a thing or two, too.
What I’ve come to find is that all of my “homeschool” problems really don’t deal with school at all. They all deal with parenting. I would likely have the same exact struggles and frustrations I have now if I did send my kids to school. They would still have bad behavior. I would still sprout new gray hairs. I would still have parenting struggles. And I’d also have less time to deal with them and work through the struggles without being with my kids throughout the day.
Take a time out and get ready to learn
Something I’ve learned over the years is, when I’m at my breaking point, I need a good time out. I need to be mindful of what I’m doing during that time. I can’t spend it on social media, fuming. I can’t binge watch a show (although, this is so my go-to regular self-care choice). No, no. I need to spend time in prayer. I need to spend time in the Word. Because I honestly, and truly, need to focus on His will and that heart change I need so greatly.
I guarantee you- if your kids are acting a fool, God is trying to teach you something, dear mom. And that something usually has to do with your own heart. I have found that when I give it all to Him, the days suddenly don’t seem as overwhelming and there is more joy in our hearts. Then, something funny happens. I no longer feel like a homeschool mom failure at all.
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